Body Fat Culture

A girl/teenager who puts a lot of thought into the world we live in sent me the following picture:

She also mentioned how she recently read a survey demonstrating that womyn tend to care more about their body weight than men care about the body weight of womyn.

Are womyn the one’s who are ill guiding this culture to have a body who requires a size 0 to feel beautiful? Why do we care to have so little fat on our bodies? To become so obsessed with weight? Are many who are overweight actually eating their depression away with food? Why were we so depressed in the first place? Was it related to body image? Or feeling as though we did not fit in the parameters of what we define as beautiful?

I feel as though I should have this all figured out. I’m a grown womyn who has been putting thought into these things for a very long time and I’m disappointed that it doesn’t all yet make sense.

I would be a liar if I said the slim beauty body-weight culture doesn’t bother me, doesn’t affect me, doesn’t make me feel negative about myself at times. Am I all to blame for this? Are my female counterparts equally responsible? Do we have a warped view of how men view us? Of how other womyn view us? Why do I care about this so much? Why do I seem to have more questions than answers? Urrr. This makes me feel dizzy, really.

I may never figure this all out however I can tell you what my ideal world looks likes. A world where health is promoted more than beauty, where eating healthy and exercising is what is praised, no matter what shape we are. Where what we invest in our bodies is more important that what we invest on our bodies. That all shapes and sizes are recognized as beautiful. Where kids love their freckles and aren’t called fatsos. Where all types of people are on the cover of magazines. Where fat is not discriminated and people care more about someone’s health if they have too much weight rather than how it makes them look.

Maybe we would all feel better about ourselves if what we idealized in our culture was more a reflection of what we see in the mirror rather than trying to be like 2% of the population.

Perhaps one day we will figure this out and eating disorders, depression and self-confidence issues due to body weight image issues will be a thing of the past. Where the ill-looking mannequins will be the minority. Cause, really, as cliché as this post sounds, we would all be lying to ourselves if we said we were already there.

Recipe Tab

I have started a new section on my blog called Recipes. Sometimes we take certain skill sets for granted and this blinds us from recognizing it as a valuable asset. For me, it’s cooking. My mother and my health have nurtured these skills and it’s time I share them with more people than those who are close to me. It will be slow in the the making as I will be adding recipes here and there however hopefully in the end it will become a valuable resource for people who live with a sensitive gut. Most of my recipes are “easy to digest” recipes. The tester: my gut for the past 20 years. It doesn’t mean what works for me will work for your gut, however hopefully some of the recipes will work. You can also contribute by sending recipes or feedback.

I have to say I’ve been quite lucky re: cooking healthy food because great joy is felt every time I cook and savour my or other peoples healthy creations. Seriously. I live with a gut disease and one of the things that help manage it gives me great joy, every day. That’s pretty cool. Cheers to having to eat everyday!

I would like to add that if you have health challenges one of my biggest revelations re: my own health struggles is that I am my own master. Your doctor may have a phd in medicine but after a while you have a phd in your illness because not only have you researched it but you lived it, you feel it. Don’t ever underestimate the power of listening to what your body has to say. It knows best.

Here are a few pictures taken at a healthy cooking retreat my dearest friend Karena and I created last summer. We spent a week in Nelson where you can find all the fine healthy ingredients you could ever want. We stayed at a hostel and used their kitchen and some of the hostellers became our taste testers. She brought a great book along: Skinny bitch in the Kitch I think it was called and we cooked vegan recipes and yum was it good!

Karena cutting a piece of the tastiest chocolate brownie ever!

Karena leaving with a piece of the tastiest vegan chocolate brownie ever!

Drama

How often do you hear that womyn can be so dramatic. That we cause so much drama in our lives and in other people’s lives. That men just aren’t as dramatic as womyn. I don’t think I need to expand on this stereotype. Thing is I think this stereotype couldn’t be more wrong.

Have you ever sat in a legislature or parliament to witness how the people who represent us make political decision for everyone? And I probably don’t have to point out the fact that most of these people just so happen to be men. They yell, they scream, they call each other names. It’s worse than a classroom, any classroom. Even in a classroom with a substitute teacher, students create less drama.

Then there’s war. How can war not be dramatic. It is drama pushed to the extreme. Do we really need to take out our big guns to risk killing people, destroying families and wasting money that could instead be invested in education, health care, poverty issues? Over what? Over territory, religion, natural resources, power? Really? Really! Really.

I say quit your drama, quit dramatizing your power struggles and just maybe we could live with less damaging drama and more harmony.  Less soldiers more peace keepers! And please stop saying womyn are more dramatic because if womyn ruled this world drama wouldn’t be as violently dramatic. Period.

From ninjawitch's t-shirt series: It's Time the Period Came Out of the Closet

Another example of why periods make this world a better place.

This posting was inspired by an exchange I had with a childhood friend of mine who’s courage I honour greatly.

A Powerful Piece of Feminism

Powerful poetry by Kendra Urdang

This piece is powerful in that it brings extremes of brilliant empowerment and disabling hatred. Some of the comments left on the youtube site “telling the world what they think about feminism” are literally mad, revealing the hatred of some men towards womyn. Pretty much proves her fervent point.

YouTube comments

vbritsi (5 days ago)

this woman is a typical leftist bitch. people like her use bogus statistics to claim that a billion women are raped every milli-second and that all men are collectively responsible for it

chrpowell (1 week ago)

bitch needs to shut up and make me a sandwich.

Feminism is just like the Ku Klux Klan, except they hate men instead of black people.

pinetree65
Feminism is just another garden-variety hate movement. Going on and on about how horrible the male half of humanity isn’t “empowring.” It’s bigotry.

TheRainbowRapist (1 month ago)

If women were in the house cooking and cleaning, their chances of being raped would be reduced significantly. So really feminists themselves are indirectly responsible for allowing a large percentage of rapes to occur.

westmeaty

give a feminist cunt the snooki punch of her life: manhood101 . com

Affaire de Coeur

Tonight I feel like writing about romantic love. The search, the plight, the challenges, the lessons so far. A few months ago I started writing a book. A book I have called Good day Mr. Handsome. It is dedicated to my future life partner. It’s kinda funny, kinda not. I bring up many ex relationships, many. Where they went wrong, where they went right and how they never worked out.

There are a few keys things I have learnt.

One is timing. I may have met Mr. Handsome a dozen times but the timing just wasn’t there. Perhaps one of us was getting over a heart break and wasn’t at a place to embrace a new relationship, or we were leaving to travel, or moving, or not being at a place of responsibility while the other was, or had been married at one time with an over-controlling ex, looming in the distance, who can’t let go of their world, or we simply lived in different distant cities and weren’t ready to part them.

Two is the more unique you are the harder it can be to find a match. It’s almost like unique scares people. Unique doesn’t fit a certain stereotype, harder to know what to expect. It doesn’t bring as much comfort nor security as a pattern we can relate too and understand. Something we seem to seek in a relationship.

Three: how cool or fiery we are. I think cool wins hands down. Once again cool is associated with being calm, in control, relaxed. Fiery is associated with hyper, spazy and perhaps a little too energetic for the average person. Perhaps this energetic nature is perceived as overwhelming, intimidating and in some cases a weakness. Although I tend to see it as romantic passion in action.

Four: family and friends. How do you connect with them? Do you get along? Enjoy each others presence? Of course you can’t get along with everyone, but overall have you made a few new friends? If more tension than joy develops amongst the person loved one’s and the person you love it makes it for one icky situation.

Five: Trust. Yes the almighty gift that is given to each one of us when we meet. A gift many of us don’t realize was given. A gift we end up taking for granted until it is severed. Good luck gluing that one back together. If other aspects of the relationship are strong, it helps, but nonetheless it is a hard one to truly regain, truly feel, truly honour again.

Six: your life path. Are they similar? Is there a parallel that can be drawn? If one really wants kids, the other really not, that could be it, the deal breaker right then and there.

Seven: Your matured sexual nature. This I find comes more into play as you age. It’s almost like we discover more what kind of sex we like and how much we expect to have it. Something we were merely discovering when we were younger.

Eight: attraction. Now that one is pretty self-explanatory and much explained and covered in our society so no real need to expand here. What I find most interesting here is that sometimes I have met people I felt attracted too who absolutely did not fit the kind of guy that I’m usually attracted too. It’s almost like their charming smile or eyes is all I really need. And that is something I feel instantly. That is something I love because it is unique, it is special, it fires up my soul.

Now will the rest fit like 2 missing pieces in a puzzle?

A womyn who “ruled” my world

I think I’m finally ready to write about my grandmaman Anna Arès (born Courteau) who past away 4 hours and 20 minutes after her 91st birthday last December.  Four days after xmas. I was so lucky to spend Christmas eve with her in her Stony Plain hospital room. Just her and I embraced the night together; I held her hand, played Christmas music and repeated Joyeux Noel about 50 times, hoping that just maybe she knew she was not alone on this very special night. Special because she hosted the most amazing gatherings on this day as a mother, grandmother and great grandmother. A most memorable night I feel most grateful to have been a part of. How lucky am I! It was a priceless night I will never let go of.

Anna Ares

I want to share who she was and who I believe I am as a result of her influence on my life.

Anna was born in a pioneer town of Saskatchewan called Zenon Park. A town that will be celebrating its 100th anniversary this summer. A celebration she wanted to attend.  A town she visited for the last time last summer. Who goes on a road trip at 90? She did. And I’m glad she went. It wasn’t an easy trip to say the least. Her bladder cancer was coming back and I can’t imagine the courage it required to travel with the pains and struggles of such a weak bladder.

Her family started from scratch in Zenon Park. They were hard workers, what pioneer wasn’t? She was the eldest of her family and assumed many responsibilities growing up, as many elders did, assisting with some of the responsibilities of raising a family.

Her dad was quite a leader in the community and she inherited some of these traits as a womyn. She pursued her studies as a nurse and knowing her as an elder I can see how that choice was so fitting to who she was. Anna also worked at a little store her family owned and this is where she first met my charming grand-papa, Aimé Ares, who died quite a few years ago now.  She went on to have 8 kids who turned out to be extraordinary people.

Anna started her family during the great depression. A time she said was hard, very hard, but this hardness softened people. They came together and helped one another. They became closer because of it. When I first heard her stories about starting her family during such a hard economic time it revealed to me that it is not the $100 000 salary and the white picket fence that is needed to nurture a healthy family, it is greater than that. Desire, commitment and a strong love of family. Of course money and status helps but sometimes the most important ingredients come from who you are, not what you are.

She soon put her family ahead of her career however in so many aspects of being a nurse she remained a nurse of life. She loved taking care not only of human life but plant life too. Throughout her life she read up on how to improve our health, our gardens, and along with every piece of reading, she took notes. In most of all her books, magazines and newspaper clippings there are scrap pieces of paper with her handwriting highlighting the information she found most interesting. Re-writing the information helped her become a walking encyclopedia of sorts, at least that is how I used to refer to her as.

Anna loved the flowers of life and loved learning how to give them all they needed to be the most beautiful flowers they could be. How close they should be seeded together, what grew best together, what nutrients the soil needed. She loved her children, grand children and great grand children the same way. She was such an accommodating lady in so many ways. She would have been one of those flowers who would grow and reveal its beauty in any environment.

One of her many gardens. This one; her acreage a la Sapiniere near Spruce Grove.

Politics was something she was not shy to express her opinions about. She paid attention to the world we lived in, and cared to talk about it with people even just last year. She couldn’t stand Alberta’s ex-Premier, Mr. Ralph Klein. Bringing him up in a conversation always got her going on a rant.

I know I’m biased but the way she cared about our world, our communities, our people she would have made a kick ass Premier, MLA, MP or Prime Minister. We would have been so lucky to have someone like her in power. All of you would have had a chance to see what I saw. She wouldn’t have voted for wars, she wouldn’t have voted to see plant life die for stupid reasons, she would have done everything in her power to feed the earth for all that it is in the healthiest of ways.

I miss her more than the little tiny cubes on my keyboard can express but above being missed I feel I am an extremely lucky soul to have seen all that she was and have her influence on all that I am. It is one of those presents in life that is everlasting.

Grand-maman and my brother Patrick who lived with her at the Sapiniere for many years before she past.

The game in the story

First, my fiery soul acted up as I read the words of a GTA FB fans who thinks it is completely acceptable to state that he kills hookers in real life to get his money back. Now the Toronto Star is reporting a new video game, describing it as a game where you can “tar and feather the Canadian prime minister… you can at least the first half online”?

Toronto Star, March 23rd, 2010

Tar and feather involves hot burning tar. It is cruel, painful, and tortured many many people, in “real” life! Either this article is mocking this piece of news, does not understand “tarring”, or is exaggerating on purpose. What ever the reason, it is a horrible play on words.

Tarring: a hateful act, as per wikipedia:

Wikipedia, March 23rd, 2010

Now here is what the Toronto Star worked with as they covered this story, the press release from the founders of this game, the Polaris Institute:

For Immediate Release:

Canada’s First Tar Sands Video Game Released TODAY

Tar Nation the game takes-on Stephen Harper and Michael Ignatieff

OTTAWA, ON – Today the Polaris Institute and Insidious Design are launching Canada’s first tar sands video game – Tar Nation – to highlight Canadian politicians’ support for the destructive tar sands. The flash driven game is visually set in a tar sands refinery and allows players to spray oil at Stephen Harper and Michael Ignatieff to get them out of the tar sands.

Included in the game is an electronic letter tool directing players to send emails to the Prime Minister and Michael Ignatieff. “With three times the greenhouse gas emissions as conventional oil, severely damaging environmental and social impacts, and negative economic consequences for other provinces, the tar sands are taking Canada in the wrong direction,” explains Tony Clarke, Executive Director of the Polaris Institute. “All Canadian political leaders have a role to play in this discussion, but right now Stephen Harper and Michael Ignatieff need the most help in re-thinking their support for the tar sands”.

Tar Nation is being launched today on facebook, online video game sites, and numerous websites including http://www.tarnation.ca .

“Canadians of all ages increasingly play games and conduct political advocacy online,” says Edward Newell of Insidious Design. “Tar Nation is a new development because it combines the two in a creative and engaging format”.

Play the game online at: http://www.tarnation.ca

They do not make mention nor make associations of this game to tarring and feathering anyone! They do not push the envelop that far. Why did you Mr. Bryn Weese when you wrote this piece? Does it make your article sound that much more “badass”? And if this game is indeed referring to tarring and feathering, could someone please clarify this because if it is the case, it would surely get the “worst activist campaign” of the year award.

FB GTA fan states he kills hookers in real life

Where do you draw the line between justifying what you are saying or doing when you play a game? Some might say well everything can be justified when you play a game because that is exactly what it is a “game”, it is not “real”. But isn’t everything we participate in this life real in one way or another?

When someone choses to get breast implants, their breast don’t suddenly become unreal. They become modified breast (some would say improved), but they are breast nonetheless. Albeit breast implants are not a game per say but my point is everything we experience is real whether it’s a transformed state or not.

When I encountered this facebook group called: I USED TO KILL THE HOOKERS IN GRAND THEFT AUTO TO GET MY MONEY BACK

I felt rage. I felt sadness. I felt agitated. I felt discouraged. These were utmost real emotions. This is what some of the 188 647 fans of this page had to say:

Screenshot of facebook fan page

“I kill hookers in real life to get my money back” and this has 2 thumbs up?? How can you feel that confident to make such a statement and get away with it in public view for everyone to see? If this game never existed would people shoot their mouth this way with complete disregard of any consequences for making such a statement? This would never be accepted as a reply to a news article of a serial killer murdering sex trade workers, yet because this is a “game” it is acceptable? Key word being acceptable.

It is almost like these type of “games” make things acceptable. If that guy gets away from stating this on this page with no consequences what is to stop him from saying this in his circle of peers? If that is acceptable, what is to say he doesn’t actually start thinking this way, or worst yet start acting this way -for “real”! It becomes a domino effects that feeds into itself and can potential go down a deadly road, literally.

Killers BECOME killers. Somehow, someway they got to that point in their life. They weren’t born a murderer, their genetics may have been predisposed and their soul ill intended but their environment also played a role in nurturing them.  And I’m certain these type of games can trigger ill souls. And thing is, these games, these fan pages, being a part of our culture, could very well have something to do with it.

Being a womyn in 2010

In honour of today, International Womyn’s Day, I thought I would keep my pj’s on, skip the make-up, go out to a coffee shop and share my thoughts on being a womyn at age 34 in 2010.

The best thing about being a 34 year old womyn is being 34.

I can’t imagine how, in my twenties, I would have dealt with the physical aspects of acquiring wrinkles (not only on my face but on my hands, feet and other places), larger pores, cellulite, more facial hair, stretch marks and a permanent crinkly nose.

I wish upon a star for all womyn to embrace aging, it opens our eyes and brings us great strength!

I can’t imagine how someone who romanticized the idea of fairy tales would have faced a fortune teller telling them that at age 34, they would be childless, husbandless and living in an above average male dominated town that let’s their trucks idle in the parking lot for an hour while they eat.

I can’t imagine that I would have believed that I couldn’t be all that I could be.

I didn’t imagine that I would end up being second to man.

I grew up with a strong independent mother. I went to an all girls high school with progressive nuns and when I was a kid I believed I could do anything a boy could do. I was very athletic and would outrun them on many occasions. I believed equality of gender was a right, not a privilege. I believed it was a way of being.

The more I age, the more I recognize I was wrong. I was misled. I wasn’t prepared to live in a male dominated world where almost every single aspect is more influenced by top down male dominating power. Religion, government, security forces, business, marketing, spiritual leaders, education, health care, sports, real-estate and even activism. Albeit I recognize there are more teachers and nurses that are womyn but those in ultimate decision making power positions are principals, school board trustees, doctors and are more predominantly male.

side note: I researched yoga philosophies this year and wanted to find one that was created by a womyn. I had the hardest time finding this. Although there are many more female yoga practitioners than males, there are many more yoga founded philosophy practices created by men than womyn. There are so many examples of this in our society.

Although I put on a brave face and pretend on most days that I am living in a world where womyn and male energies share the power of influence on our culture, our decisions, our evolution, beneath it all, I hurt and am angry but somehow have the strength to not let it push me down further.

I see us working on all these worthy causes: environment, war, poverty etc… and I recognize these as important issues however I am realizing more than ever that these are symptoms of a larger problem. A problem we see as being less than many of the causes I have mentioned above.

How many womyn do you know resort to physical violence to solve a problem?

How many womyn do you know throw out their garbage outside a car window?

How many womyn do you know murder?

How many womyn to you know express great sensitivity and compassion?

How many womyn do you know nurture life on a regular basis?

I’m not asking these questions with the purposes of finding black and white answers because they aren’t. It is not because someone is male that he resorts to more physical violence than his female neighbour just because he is male. However generally speaking there are differences between male and female energy and I believe these differences are there for a reason and are equally worthy of being.

When the sperm meets the egg, they are both different entities yet equally important, 50/50. Their balance creates life.

It is my realization at 34 years old that if this world worked on achieving a fair, equal and harmonies balance between female and male energy it would have a greater effect on all worthy causes. There would be less wars, there would be less environmental destruction, there would be less poverty, there would be less “survival of the fittest mentality”. It would be a better place. A place that is possible because we have the womyn on this earth to make it possible. All we need to do is invite them in, implement their ideas, elect them in office, offer them positions of power and ensure gender parity in all realms of life.

I have to address the Margaret Thatcher argument because I predict she will cross many people’s minds in that: Well she was elected, she believed in wars, she was no different, why would other womyn be? First of all we must realized, we live in a man’s world, we are acculturated to think like them, behave like them, please them! and many believe in order to “make it” you need to act as a man. It some ways we have become assimilated.

Change takes time, cultural shifts takes time, freeing a womyn in all absolute sense takes time. In my opinion it would take many generations before we would actually witness the beautiful effects of womyn being right alongside men while making the biggest decisions on this planet and in our communities. There are many layers masking us. It will take generations for the mask to peel off and reveal its beautiful self.

Thanks 34 years for revealing to me the wisdom that comes with aging as a womyn and giving me the skills to deal with hurt and sadness in a way that doesn’t further take away from me.

Happy Womyn’s Day to all womyn irrelevantly of who you are and how great you are. You are courageous just by the mere fact of being a womyn on this earth.

Here’s an amazing documentary on the herstory of womyn and what this world may have looked like, felt like, when womyn and men ruled side by side. You will find this under the herstory tab. It was produced by the National Film Board of Canada.

Doritos Bras commercial for Doritos Contest in Memory of France Lacasse

Some of Drayton Valley’s Supersheroes came together to make this video.